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Not with food coloring. [You probably shouldn't food color the ruins. Though, actually...] Is this food coloring?

[That's what Sans used, so he assumed, but it's not like he did a chemical analysis.]

Yes. [Papyrus watches him skeptically, but he's not catching any particular things of Weirdness.] Not because you're food! But because it's safe to eat.

[There was, after all, every chance that Sans would get it dumped on his head. And while Papyrus wouldn't mind a little spice of danger to his pranks back in the days before they died, these days... Well, surprise bucket flinging is enough.]

[Well, he's not food to anyone in this room. That thing underground, though...]

Food coloring'd probably mess with the symbols' integrity, or ruin their dating attempts, or somethin' like that. [For as much time as Sans spends out at the dig site, archeology still isn't anything he's actually trained in. He still mostly does math and pokes at the symbols.] Don't wanna encourage anyone to take a bite out of one of 'em.

Or discourage anyone from dating them!

[He has heard of carbon dating by now, recognizes what Sans is getting at - but who knows, maybe someone wants to smooch a symbol, too!!

...Plus, it's an amusing enough image to introduce to the conversation that maybe it'll distract Sans from that food comment.]

Nobody's been working at night with candles and a fancy dinner, have they...?

Don't think so. [The idea is enough to get a grin out of Sans, though.] Or if they are, they're keepin' it pretty secret, 'cause if anyone found out everyone'd know by the next day.

[That's important gossip, you know.]

Wouldn't put it past some of 'em, though.

[Might be worth teasing some people over. Maybe not. He's not sure if he can be bothered.]

Well, if you need a chaperone visiting them, just let me know!

[He says this somewhat teasingly himself - Sans has so many pictures of that one symbol, after all. Worrying, in light of all those symbols popping up in that underground trek, but less worrying if they joke about it. Is it Sans's lock screen or wallpaper..?]

[Luckily, no--Sans's lock screen and wallpaper are both still the default options.]

A chaperone? Is this one of those weird human period piece romance shows? [Or maybe like that play Mettaton was working on.]

[Phew. So it's probably just normal weird obsessing over things, and not an inexplicably romance brewing in the background. Which means, even moreso, Papyrus isn't about to give the joke up.]

Candlelit dinners are just the start, Sans! Before you know it, everyone's got... horse-drawn carriages, and bustles, and maybe even monogrammed kerchiefs. [Mettaton's play aside, someone's read some more human romance novels since winding up in the canyon.]

[Sans has no idea what a bustle is in this context.] I dunno if the carriages are gonna work in the ruins, there's some pretty tight spots. Maybe some ponies.

[Are there even ponies in San Benedicto? Irrelevant.]

You can't even fit carriages...? I don't know if this is going to work out.

[That said. How much warning and expense does it take to rent a pony for the day? Papyrus may have an idea for the afternoon.]

Well, there's plenty of space outside the ruins, but if we're all dating the symbols, we're gonna have to go in.

[You can't just park a carriage on top of some ancient ruined house, probably.]

No, no, that's fine! The carriages are just for dramatic period entrances. I'm sure the... the symbols would appreciate the artistry of the approach?

[This has accidentally turned into fishing for information as to whether Sans will claim the symbols have feelings about things like that, for all it'd be unclear if he'd be joking with whatever answer he might give.

On another level, Papyrus is already checking his budgeting and running searches for pony rentals and edible fruit arrangements. With a card filled out to 'THE MYSTERIOUS SYMBOLS'.]

You're reading too many of those weird books, bro. [Papyrus will just have to keep wondering about whether or not Sans thinks the symbols have feelings about carriages. But a response like that probably means no, he does not think this.]

Pssshhh, they're extremely normal books!! Found in basically literally every bookstore on the surface. And loads of garage sales. [Okay, some of them are better quality than those that found their way underground - but some of them resale for 25 cents for reasons. He sniffs to underline his exaggerated and mostly faux outrage, and updates the symbol question with an unresolved flag.]

But if they're too artistic for you, I guess you can keep doting on them however you are now.

Mostly we try to read 'em. We're getting better at it. [Even if it's because of getting that notebook and of all the awfulness surrounding it, Sans does still want to work on the symbols.]

...Are you? [He pauses in the middle of confirming his credit card information.] How do you tell?

[It's still unclear to him whether the symbols are more magic runes, a cipher, some other language, some combination of the above... Or why they whisper, in Sans's memories. Every now and then he starts getting interested, even asks - and then Sans makes some offputting comment about them with no sign of thinking it's weird, and he changes his mind again.]

Well, 'cause we can read 'em at all. [An improvement from "nothing at all" to "something" counts, right?] Like that one spider symbol means "it waits".

[What was Papyrus thinking about offputting comments? But Sans tenses up a little, reflexively, so apparently Sans doesn't like that translation.] Too bad it's got that kinda translation.

Wow, really...? [He was thinking that it was a good time to give himself some foreshadowing, is what he was thinking. Sheesh, Sans. But at least Sans is recognizing it's not a great sentiment.]

I mean, yeah, too bad!! It could have been something better. Like, about a bake sale. [You know, as spiders do.] Maybe it's waiting for the perfect day to make some donuts. Or for its website to finish loading...

[Too bad nobody ever taught the spiders to make websites. Or maybe not, who knows what Muffet would have done with that sort of reach. Well, she's dead too now. (It hurts, but not as much as it did. He didn't know Muffet well.)]

'S always a good day for donuts. Dunno what it's waiting for if it's that.

I don't know, do astronomy things make a difference in baking...? [Some of his idle late-night multitasking readings have lead to learning that yeasts in different parts of the world apparently have noticeable differences, to the point that connoisseurs can identify them. Elevation makes a difference, humidity makes a difference, the moon exerts enough gravitational force to apparently make the oceans move... Maybe all those sayings about stars being in alignment mean something more than poetry.]

[Sans considers this.] There's solar cookers. Or, I dunno, maybe an ionizing particle hits some computer chip in your oven and messes stuff up. [That is extremely unlikely, though.]

In my... oven. [The robot helmet is off in the workshop for tinkering in the off-chance Papyrus needs a (not-so) secret identity, so Papyrus's expression isn't particularly robotical. Just a brief staring off, as he puts a few seconds into refreshing his knowledge on ionizing particles.]

...Wow! Looks like ionizing particles... get worse the higher up you get? Good thing we're down in a canyon... Would hate to bake on top of a mountain. [How high the canyon actually puts them, is a question he almost asks. But why voice the worrying thought, when he can scrounge up on his own? There's fun info like latitude, longitude, and elevation in one of the pages about the city, and... hmm. That's at least a couple factors of likelihood. He's suddenly aware of his various computer chips like someone just tapped a tuning fork at them all.]

Well, it depends on the oven. Not all of 'em have computer chips. And you'd have to get really unlucky. [The odds of it actually messing up what you're cooking are extremely low.] Solar cookers are a better way to cook with space.

Oh, yeah? [This is part open invitation for Sans to talk about Something Space, part distracted attempt to give himself a conversational space in which to continue his study.

Yes, various cosmic rays sometimes flip bits, which might just be part of why he's hearing them. Gamma rays are especially penetrating and good at causing problems, which is why they're a comic book staple - and, even more exciting, they're also caused by things like lightning. But the occasional error is almost always minor, not causing catastrophic crashes...]

Well, yeah. It's like when you crack an egg on the sidewalk to cook it, but you don't use a sidewalk. [Sans absolutely tried the crack an egg on the sidewalk thing when they arrived in summer, incidentally. A few times in different places.] Might get one for the hot dog cart. Bet it'd bring in a crowd. [Just Sans cooking hot dogs with a solar funnel cooker and blinding anyone who happens to stand at the wrong angle.]

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Papyrus: distract from symbols with reminder of space

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