ribticklers: (036)
Sans ([personal profile] ribticklers) wrote2021-05-30 02:49 am

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[Distant trombone noises.]
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spaghettimonster: (LOOKS THAT WAY)

[personal profile] spaghettimonster 2022-07-03 05:41 am (UTC)(link)
Sometimes things are unexpectedly awful!! [The on-edge cheer of his repetition doesn't abate, and if anything is all the stronger. Contradicting Sans's words, but agreeing with the sentiment behind them. He hesitates after saying so, though, and waits a second to dare adding:] Things like... everything.

[Now that he's mentioned it... He wants to keep talking. There's a floodgate of things to complain about, express fear about, seek - and give! - reassurances about. Too much for any old movie to just cover over. But... but he doesn't want to trample over Sans's hurts, if his brother really can't talk about it right now. Sans didn't even get the comfort of a shower, yet. The least Papyrus can do is throw him a bone.] This is worse than any just Tuesday around here. It's... it's a Threesday, at least.
spaghettimonster: (WHAT ACTUALLY HAPPENED?)

[personal profile] spaghettimonster 2022-07-03 06:58 am (UTC)(link)
You said a lot of dumb stuff...? [It's less agreement than incredulous question, though it's a bit of both. Papyrus huffs a breath resembling that bitter laugh, but doesn't outright voice it.] Dumb stuff was kind of going around, there! It's hard to think any of that was true, with how... extreme, all my feelings were getting.

[Hard. Not impossible. Not by a long shot. Emphasized, exaggerated... but all of it based in something true. He has to think it's the same for Sans. But he has to give them both the potential out.]
spaghettimonster: (GUESS THAT DEPENDS...)

[personal profile] spaghettimonster 2022-07-03 08:14 am (UTC)(link)
At least twice as much. [Vague and agreeing in turn, as he tries to puzzle out what specifics Sans might mean. Papyrus isn't clinging to math-themed puns intentionally, but if it's happening, it's happening, no sense struggling about it.

...Which really isn't the kind of thought he usually has, or rather isn't the kind of thought he usually stops at. And he doesn't need the ping of the internal model to tell him so. That thought's more helpless than his usual trains of thought, but entirely within the habits that had started forming for his negative self, when he was no longer able to calm down but trying not to veer into anger at anyone. He stares at Sans, sidelong, looking for any hint of that kind of feeling now.]
spaghettimonster: (LOOKS THAT WAY)

[personal profile] spaghettimonster 2022-07-05 02:09 am (UTC)(link)
Heh. Yeah, I guess! Before someone else goes and... talks about it for us? [It's not as though their split selves were outright other people, as difficult as it is to relate to the extreme intensity or muted pleasantry of how those halves were behaving. But something - Ozpaka, he has little doubt - did that splitting and intensifying for them. So, in a way, it's as if all those too-honest barbs had been someone else talking for them.]

Badly. [He adds as an addendum.] Talks about it badly, through us. Or something twisted up like that.

[...Though, given Sans's first reaction on recombining hadn't been a shower, a nap, a snack, or any other kind of relaxing refreshing thing, but... the proactive step of sharing what information he had, with all the others who might think to read it...? Papyrus glances sidelong at Sans's halo, a degree of consideration stronger than his dread about this.]
spaghettimonster: (THE GREATER GOOD)

[personal profile] spaghettimonster 2022-07-05 02:41 am (UTC)(link)
...Or when, right? [Papyrus doesn't quite stress the word, but his hands wring in his lap. For what it's worth, he's not quite sitting up straight either, especially by his standards. Part of it is the angled position he's taken to using, the better to give his fans a bit of space, so he doesn't overheat loudly enough to make the TV hard to hear. But part of it is something... tired.]

But there's no waiting until things aren't weird. That probably won't be until we're dead! [He glances off at Dinah's soul, floating silently over the table, then off into the fragmented memories of countless deaths.] Or, I guess, until we're all eaten--! [His voice shuts off with a snap as he closes his mouth hurriedly, wincing a little at the painful abruptness of metal teeth on skeletal teeth, but it's worth it to cut that kind of high-strung sentiment off before he can get too far. It sounded entirely too much like... Well, like him, the way he was getting over the last week or so. Part of how he strives not to be, especially now.]
spaghettimonster: (I'M UH. SUPER STOKED. REALLY. INSIDE.)

[personal profile] spaghettimonster 2022-07-05 02:56 am (UTC)(link)
[Papyrus nods, something tired on his face. That response, of one person charging underground to do something about it, others talking of doing so, like they were all taking the warning as a challenge, and not in a fun Undyne way. Grief about her is more immediate and raw again, with the memories of getting to know her better, of living with her, of grieving her under other circumstances rolling around.]

...D-Doesn't even seem worth posting the video. [Even admitting the potential futility of an effort they put time into is rough.] Those kids might, uh... just try to befriend Jonas, without even...

[He shakes his head, deliberately trailing off, and tightens the grip his fingers have on each other.]

No, better to... To not give them any hints how to get down there at all! And, maybe, they'll get... bored of the idea. And do something else. [It's not a very Papyrusy approach. He's self conscious and unhappy about it. If it weren't for the cold shower, he'd already be overheating with the processing strain of everything.]
spaghettimonster: (I'M FINE!)

[personal profile] spaghettimonster 2022-07-05 03:38 am (UTC)(link)
My...? [Papyrus startles at the offer, and while his expression is still tired, his reaction isn't particularly subdued, even for him.] Wh-Why would you...? I mean, I guess you've been seeing those texts. And I admit, it's not great looking! But, last time it was in the teens. This is nothing!

[There's some reflexive boastfulness, some of course the Great Papyrus can handle anything, even partially dulled emotions, to his response. There's an uneasiness, discomfort with losing his emotional balance in the overwhelming rush - not helped with how the last weeks have gone. And...]

...Can you manage happy, right now? [It's a little bit concern for Sans, with everything. A little bit wistful, with how he's struggling for it. A little bit hopeful.]
spaghettimonster: (IT'S OKAY TO NOT BE OKAY SOMETIMES)

[personal profile] spaghettimonster 2022-07-05 04:08 am (UTC)(link)
[Papyrus briefly half-smiles, a mix of sad satisfaction at something confirmed, and something commiserating to hear it. He had a feeling it wouldn't be as easy as that, for either of them to drag each other up out of all this.]

Yeah, after is very what I want. I still have backups to do, anyway! And I don't need another... [He trails off, hesitating, then sets his jaw as he braces himself. It's easier to take initiative to start the conversation, with his feelings somewhat numbed, and the worry about how it could go less worrying. And yet it's harder to take initiative, to go into any real details, with so much less optimism about how it could go. He summarizes.] ...I don't need another unhappy reset, right now. It's going way slower, we have time.

[And if they don't have time, because everything goes to shit all at once, then everything's gone to shit anyway and a third of his feelings being missing will hardly be the biggest thing on their minds. That's some kind of pessimistic optimism.]
spaghettimonster: (SANS I...)

[personal profile] spaghettimonster 2022-07-05 04:34 am (UTC)(link)
Y-Yeah. [Papyrus wrings gloved hands again for a few seconds.] Let's, uh... Actually! I'll list things out. Let me know if I miss any, I promise I won't take as any kind of hint. [Maybe it'll be easier to talk about talking about things, and accidentally and casually sidle into one of the topics.]

Firstly, there's... Well, there's my emotions, and the draining thing... again. There's the splitting in two emotions thing, and how extreme everyone got... [Even the pieces that were broadcast to the network hinted at some big life choices that people will be dealing with ramifications from.] There's... some things, in particular, that various skeletons said. About what we live for, or... or not living, for a while. And there's the terrible choices people are making! Or recently made. [With an effort, he doesn't outright look at the soul floating over the table. Not directly. He just glances, briefly, pointedly, like the hint of attention her way will distract from the question of what Sans lives for or how many times various skeletons remember dying.]
spaghettimonster: (I STILL THINK THAT BUT...)

[personal profile] spaghettimonster 2022-07-05 05:08 am (UTC)(link)
Mmhmm. Yeah, I veto any more splitting in two! Not a recommended experience for anyone. [It starts light and jokey enough, matching the initial tone a little. But his voice drops off as he goes, in volume and cheer, to something quieter and serious. Like he's reluctant to say this too loudly.] Even before things got too intense. Just... not being able to cheer up, at all...?

[His negative self had been awake for a while, he realized over time - each half realized it, separately. But he's only now really putting together what that was. Fear and shame, and none of Papyrus's practiced positivity to push past it, and it left him hiding in the dark.]
spaghettimonster: (THANKS SANS)

[personal profile] spaghettimonster 2022-07-05 05:52 am (UTC)(link)
Everything was annoying. And nothing was. [But that's the easy answer, the deflecting and avoidant answer. He can hear the hint of fishing for perspective, validation, and maybe reassurance - or maybe he's assuming, because that's what he'd want.] Okay, I didn't like that I couldn't, well... couldn't reason with you! But I couldn't reason with either of you. Or me, or much of anybody.

...Fighting was better than apathy. [He says, like he's not letting his own emotions slowly numb out. But even mostly numbed he'd still wanted things and worked towards them, actively going through the motions. The relative passivity of apathy...]
spaghettimonster: (I'M UH. SUPER STOKED. REALLY. INSIDE.)

[personal profile] spaghettimonster 2022-07-05 06:13 am (UTC)(link)
[Papyrus doesn't hide agreement that they'd both expect Sans to be too lazy to keep it up, and he waits patiently enough for the rest of the idea, in no hurry to speak painful words of his own. But this description of anger...]

Angry with everyone and everything, huh? [Maybe he's reading into that - obviously Sans was mad at the murderous human, in the middle of fighting them. But given how immediately Sans - the unhappy one - had been talking like Papyrus would trip over something and die, the moment he was out of sight and maybe even before then... He half-smiles again, rueful. They hadn't had enough time to talk, in Snowdin. Or, maybe, they'd failed to talk thousands of times. Room to be angry with him for dying, either way.]

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